The Monstrous Samsung Galaxy View: The Dark Android Take

I’m a bit of a fan of tablets. Android tablets, in particular, but I suppose iPads can be nice, too, if Apple is your thing. At the Dark Android Project, I usually recommend tablets for security issues with SIM cards–which most tablets don’t have (and if you can remove them from your smartphone, that’s just as good, too)–so I often get asked to give reviews on the latest tablets to come out, and how well they work towards making a “DAPS-ready” device…or a at least a device that can be used with privacy and security in mind.

Honestly, this doesn’t happen often, as in the United States–of which I am a denizen–there are few new tablets that get released. That doesn’t mean there aren’t any good tablets out there, there just aren’t many that get released. And it’s funny, because I often hear other tech journalists constantly claiming that tablets are dead, but when I was just on multiple coast-to-coast flights in the USA, it seemed like almost everyone had an Android tablet (there were very few iPads). So I’m guessing these people just mean that tablets aren’t selling…but that indeed they are popular (at least in my anecdote, anyway). And I’m glad that they are. Tablets are very versatile devices.

Well, the one I’m about to mention here may not be so versatile…or at least not as portable.

Behold the 18.4-inch Samsung Galaxy View…

sasmungview1Great Satan, that’s a beast of a thing. So beastly it has a carrying handle! Personally, I resisted any kind of mainstream use of laptops until the era of the netbooks which started in at 7-inch and 9-inch screens because, frankly, they were finally portable. That is so key for me. To have actual portability, not just mobility. And tablets are really the netbook’s (which I still love in concept) little challenged cousin…except the Galaxy View is not little at all. So right out of the gate, I see this thing as pointless. Buy an ultrabook, or laptop, or whatever. This thing defeats every purpose of a tablet on all sides.

Even the specs are highly questionable…it only has 2GB of RAM! What the fuck? My 5.5″ ASUS Zenfone 2 has 4GB of RAM in it! What’s the Galaxy View’s excuse for having anything less? It can’t be price, as this thing is supposedly starting out with a tag of at least $599 USD (again, that’s just at the base level, supposedly). That’s ridiculously high for what are, in my opinion, unimpressive specs. Here, take a look for yourself:

samsungview2It’s not even coming with Android (6.0) Marshmallow! Personally, I find the whole device dubious in its very existence. While large tablets aren’t that new, this one just seems out of place when you consider that a lot of the more interesting productivity software just isn’t available on Android (unlike past gigantic Windows-based tablets, which I also think are ridiculous). Maybe this is the start of the recently theorized “make Android and Chrome OS into one pretty desktop environment initiative” and have it run on laptops, etc., but if so, this is a piss-poor hardware showing from Samsung. And there are much better options out there, anyway (such as the classic 2013 Nexus 7, the Sony Xperia Z3 Compact, and the higher-end model of the ASUS ZenPad S 8.0).

From a Dark Android device perspective, Samsung devices generally fail since their in-house Exynos processors make the rooting of your Android device (allowing you to have actual control of the device) very difficult.

So I can’t recommend this monstrosity (in a bad way) on any front. There is nothing of appeal here. Even if it came with a giant battery (which it doesn’t), that massive screen would likely drain it so quickly to the point of being meaningless.

Nope. The Samsung Galaxy View is a loser. I recommend spending your money elsewhere (or save your money altogether).

Carpe lucem!